Make up Artist on the Prowl

Having plan to meet with my dearest most annoying friend last week and having arranged a trip to London to talk to the company organising our huge event at the end of year (more on that later in the year), I of course managed to get the flu.

No, not that flu. Just a very annoying bug with mutating symptoms. I blame Jamie (from the academy ) for it since I was fine until he came in to work looking like an extra from one of these horrid hospital series. Bad Jamie! He is obviously sitting in the corner thinking about what he has done..

If summer flu wasn’t bad enough, the said annoying friend is making me worry a tad. Last I heard he wasn’t too good and taken he is in the UK, well, lack of contact is indeed worrisome. Are you thinking swine flu? Dear me, no, I wasn’t referring to that. We are not following a theme here, where I get the ordinary flu and he does one better. Don’t be Ridiculous. Besides, he wouldn’t be seen dead having such an affliction darling. In fact, unless it shopped in BT it would have been served with a restraining order and not be allowed within contaminating distance of him.

You might think I am exaggerating. I mean, worrying about someone as fit and healthy as my dearest friend must be pushing the nurturing instinct a tad too far. Well, let me state my case and perhaps you will understand the reason I feel so uneasy about this.

First, he is annoying. He is the type of person whom dares have the cutest little dog you could
phantom and then move the dog away without warning. He also seems to “know” everything about everything.


Second, the last time I was busy and lost touch with him for a bit he was photographed obviously having a day off AKA nervous breakdown. I mean, please look at this picture and tell me if I am overacting!

So now you know the size of it.

I am crossing my fingers here and hoping he is in full control of his faculties as I get rid of this flu, which better be soon. Being sick is the most boring thing one must endure.







My claim that the flu and make up should never mix holds true. . It isn’t just contrary to all hygiene and safety guidelines make up artists subscribe to, it is mutually exclusive. Shot and foot springs to mind when I think how I cease to be a make-up artist as I have the flu although to be fair this could be a great thing for all concerned.

Why? Try this. Imagine feeling ghastly and giving an interview about new make-up trends. I know, how absurd. I can hear you thinking. Anybody with any sense would just crawl into bed and stay there until it was safe to poke their heads out or in the very least they could remember what they know. Their name in the very least. Right?

Well, possibly. The truth is, you get a call and you are asked if you could impart some sound bytes related to the new season trends and you say sure. You speak before your mind computes the logistics. Sure is such a short easy reply that you feel almost human again. You think ‘ok, I must be better. I can form a coherent reply’

I can assure you I am a very sensible person so it is a mystery to me what happened and why I said sure and hence spent a few minutes sitting in front of the studio lights talking about god knows what.

That is the thing you see. You are there with the studio lights warming your face and the presenter smiling at you but you have no idea what you are saying or if it is even legal. Worse, if it is sound advice. At this point, taken I don’t remember much about what I said, if I said orange lipstick is gorgeous and everybody should buy one, please, forget it was ever mentioned, bin the orange offender and try huge shoulder pads instead as a tribute to the 80s.

As for moi, I will just head to bed and stay there until I am no longer toxic and can be a make-up artist again.


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